Football Fortune Telling: NFL Power Rankings Edition 2

Ciaran Cole, Senior Editor-In-Chief

The season for NFL athletes is almost half-over, but the fun hasn’t stopped yet. Exciting games and wild injuries are making for some crazy playoff projections. To go over all the crazy stuff that has gone down in the last couple of weeks, I’m back with those power rankings I promised! In this edition, I use exactly nine words each time to give my thoughts on teams. Here, we go!

1) Steelers (7-0) – Crushed Lamar, no stopping that Defense even without Bush!

2) Cardinals (5-2) – Beat Seahawks ✓ Easiest Remaining NFC West Schedule ✓ Kliff Kingsbury

3) Chiefs (7-1) Jets got annihilated… More than usual too. Mahomes finally explodes.

5) Seahawks (6-1) Big bounceback versus the 49ers + Jamal Adams returning… probably.

6) Buccaneers (6-2) Antonio Brown boosts Tampa to wideout heaven for Brady.

7) Colts (5-2) Offense finally showed up! And the defense scores too!

8) Packers (6-2) Frisco wasn’t real yet. Adams is a dream though.

9) Saints (5-2) Kamara’s talents can only barely outrun the defensive problems.

10) Ravens (5-2) Dez Bryant adds another under the radar weapon.

11) Dolphins (4-3) Cornerbacks playing like sharks, don’t even need Tua!

12) Bills (5-2) Barely survived two teams with a 2-13 combined record. #NoMVPforAllen

13) Eagles (3-4-1)  1.5 game-lead in NFC East = safer than Steeler’s division lead

14) Chicago (5-3) Collapsing, but not collapsing. The conundrum of Chicago.

15) Rams (5-3) Buried in a Miami Cemetery last week. Private ceremony. #RIPTakingGoff1stOVR

16) Raiders (4-3) The most average team out there gets this spot.

17) Browns (5-3) Baker Mayfield is the new Jameis Winston pretty much.

18) Broncos (3-4) Only lost 1/4 last games. Can Lindsay carry them?

19) Lions (3-4) Theoretically in it still. Patricia’s numbers aren’t good, however.

20) 49ers (4-5) Losing Kittle is a death sentence to playoff hopes.

21) Panthers (3-5) McCaffrey’s return is a PR win and generates confidence.

22) Vikings (2-5) Cousins at least sleeps at night with Cook healthy.

23) Browns (2-4-1) Who cares about the wins when you’re team’s finally fun?

24) Falcons (2-6) A questionably dirty win over the Panthers isn’t inspiring.

25) Giants (1-7) Good effort versus Tampa, but as always, short again.

27) Patriots (2-5) Karma for all the superbowls? Maybe. Yet Jets Match-Ups remain.

28) Chargers (2-5) Mentored by Atlanta, they learned well how to choke.

29) Texans (1-6) Watt looks more and more depressed every noon kickoff.

30) Jaguars (1-6) Six game losing streak… Minshew Mania is actual mania.

31) Jets (0-8) They showed some heart versus the Bills and Chiefs.

32) Cowboys (1-7) The safety on purpose playing the Eagles was horrifying.


That’s enough of that for this week!